Three Women. One Man.

Pepa: Last night was the worst in a while. Ivan haunted me in my dreams. Even though I’ve had other boyfriends—not many, mind you—why would he still appear after so many years?

Marisa: Candela told me the same thing happens to her with Carlos. Yes, she did try to stay with him until he got his hair back, then she let him go for a guy who was naturally hairless, but still, he appears to her months after their final goodbyes.

Candela: If you wanted to tell the story of my life, you could have asked me; I was only in the kitchen looking for anything but gazpacho to sip on while we chatted.

Marisa: Sorry, cielo, I thought it was the perfect thing to say in answer to her haunting dream with Ivan. I also have dreams with Carlos, and I haven’t had as many dates as you have Pepa, but I go through the motions. Work, shopping, walking the dog to the park to see if someone new is there with his dog as well, church when I can, the Internet. No, I think that’s not been popularized yet. After all, it’s only 1990. I’m getting ahead of myself.

Pepa: Niña, the oddest things come out of your mouth. Well, really out of our mouths. It’s like we have little control. Sometimes we allude to things that don’t quite fit into our time period. Clearly we long for something better than our present technological world has to offer. I wonder why he insists on being so self-conscious when we talk.

Candela: It’s because the writer’s male. If it were one of us, we’d stick to the time period at hand & not even mention ourselves. We’d let the characters talk. Meanwhile, back at the Ivan & Carlos in-our-dreams line of thought—

Pepa: So Marisa, no interesting men in church, especially on Wednesday nights when only the quality guys attend?

Marisa: No not really, Mostly married men come with their sleepy wives. Some men dart in and out to see if anyone new is visiting. The only regular contact is Rodrigo. He’s the married Mexican who’s overstayed his visa and is always afraid some day he’ll be deported.

 
Candela: No, no, Marisa. Not deported; that’s only in America where people have to worry about being deported. Here in Spain, we welcome their diversity, or so we’d like to think. And at least, he speaks Spanish, so we don’t have to look for a translator.

Pepa: So you’re only contact at church is with a married Mexican who’s overstayed his visa? Not the most hopeful of prospects, sweetie. So nothing happened between you at all?

Marisa: I mean, we always pray together & go out afterwards for ice cream or light shopping, then, I drive him home. Last Wednesday as we licked the last of our ice cream cones, he said, “Marisa. I’ll always remember you when I go back to Mexico.” I was touched he said that, but not comfortable with such candor, I quickly said, “As will I, Rodrigo, I’ll think of you too. But you’re not going back to Mexico anytime soon.” Every time we say goodbye, I always think it’s the last time, because of the deportation thing, that may or may not happen. At least I have him to talk to in church. The other ladies are either holding their crying toddlers or talking of when they used to have kids of their own. There’s not much in common with them, I’m afraid.

Candela: You’re behaving well. Me, I have to constantly take my appetite suppressant so I don’t substitute food for the love I don’t have right now. It’s not easy being good Christian women, after all the wild nights with even wilder men that we’ve known in our lives. Virgins in the church have it so good. They’re not as tempted because they’ve never been with a man. They’re young and with any luck, they’ll marry their current boyfriends, and life will be all right until their husband leaves them or dies in one of the many raging wars we get involved in from decade to decade. Then those Christian ex-virgins are in our shoes. Women in love with Him, but longing for the intimacy they used to enjoy with their missing husband.

Pepa: Non-christian women have it so easy. Well not so easy, but easier. Not all, mind you, but most, or to be fair, some, feel a need for sex and it’s easier than it is for us. They may make hasty decisions, and regret the next day or week after, or get lucky and stay with the man for a while, then they’re fine till the next “big need” comes up. For us though, we can’t live with ourselves if we do what we used to do before we met Him. We have to grin and bear it, get involved with other things, or focus on the reality of Christ—ah, at last I use the ineffable name—and enjoy our lives as much as we can.

Candela: Or we could be “modern” Christian women and say we love Christ and love men too. I mean, didn’t you try that for a while? Oh, sorry, that’s how you wound up with Ivan, wasn’t it.

Marisa: Give it time. Take care of yourself. Don’t criticize yourself too much; it only leads to depression. Eat right, keep in touch, loose yourself in your work.

Pepa: Don’t think you have all the right approaches. I want to work on my potential. There are things I could have done when I was younger, that I can’t redo, career-wise, but I can do the best with what I have to work with right now, myself and all the opportunities I have at my disposal.

Candela

Marisa: Yes, true. We’re following the self-help books and the good book as best as we can. Our only other option, is to do whatever we want with our desires or urgent needs, or just wait for the Man to make his plans clearer for our lives. Thank God, we have each other. Where would we be without understanding friends, Christian or otherwise?